Think of your 5 closest friends. People you see all the time, maybe every single day.

Think of their position in life, how they’re perceived, their job, income, etc.

Is that what/who you aspire to be?

We all know the saying “you’re the sum of the 5 people you spend the most time with”, right?

So why are you hanging out with fucking losers?

Yes, I’m sorry to be the bearer of bad news, but Timmy, your lifelong friend, is a fucking loser.

And the more you hang out with Timmy, the more you’ll be like Timmy.

Do you really want to be like Timmy? Would you switch lives with Timmy? Probably fucking not.

We all suffer from it. It’s hard to cut off people we’ve known our whole lives, I get it. They might be your only friends.

But, it’s coming to a point in your life where you can either stay where you’re at and never have to face to pain of losing them, or advance exponentially in life and surround yourself with winners.

I had my first taste of a true networking experience last weekend. Let me explain.

I joined a networking group in early March to do exactly what I’m preaching in this article thus far; to surround myself with driven & focused winners. It’s well exceeded my expectations.

The group hosts IRL events every so often all across the world. By God’s grace, the very next in person event they were hosting was right in my backyard, Chicago. I signed up as soon as I found out.

When I first signed up, I was hyped. “How hard could this be, just meet a bunch of guys? I’ve done that for 23 years straight, I’m good”.

As the weeks passed and the event came closer, my body started to wholeheartedly reject the entire idea of the event as a whole.

“This is so stupid, I won’t even get anything out of it” (You guarantee you won’t get anything out of it by not going, idiot).

“I can network on my own, why would I even go” (????? That’s the point??).

“I don’t do things like this, my way is better” (Your way has lead you to where you’re at in life, I don’t think you have a fucking clue).

When I took a step out of my body and started mentally analyzing myself, I realized that this event was the exact thing I needed.

I had so many negative thoughts and so much resistance towards it because it was going to put me in the most uncomfortable position I’ve ever been in.

I typically go places with friends, go out with people I know, or always have someone I can lean on in any social setting.

I’ve never really done anything like this alone at all since I’ve never been put in that position.

I realized that the reason why there was so much resistance was because I knew it would be extremely uncomfortable for me to do this, and I had no “out”.

Imagine pulling up to an event of professionals, mostly millionaires, being one of the youngest people there with no practice in a professional setting and not knowing a single person. Pretty fucking scary, no?

But, I took all this in and internalized it as a learning experience. Kind of a “what’s the worst that can happen” situation.

I knew that I would ultimately learn a lot about myself regardless of what happens, so I forced myself to go.

Plus, I already signed up, so I would have to explain to the group why I was backing out (which was arguably more terrifying).

So I said fuck it. I committed and told myself that I’ll go and give it my best shot no matter what.

The event consisted of a few events spanning two days; a shooting range session centered around defensive handgun movements, a cocktail hour & dinner, a private cigar lounge & chat on Saturday, then a sparring session the next day followed by a brunch on Sunday to cap the weekend off.

The keys to the weekend were the cocktail hour & dinner along with the cigar lounge & chat events on Saturday. These are pretty standard environments for a networking event, however, I was brand new to this whole thing.

I’ve never been at a professional event outside of doing things for my social fraternity in college (real professional), so I felt extremely out of place upon arrival.

But, I stuck to my tenants of networking and asked people about themselves while having an interesting story to tell about myself. I think I told my story verbatim over 20 times last weekend.

Nevertheless, I had so many interesting and in-depth conversations with so many interesting people over the weekend.

People came to the event from all walks of life; broke, working 9-5, having their own business, millionaires, employing over 1,000 people, you name it.

In fact, 2 people came to the event in Lamborghinis. You would’ve never even guessed who was driving them by the way they acted around other people.

Humble as can be, and asking genuine questions about other people to learn from them.

It was also the first time I’ve ever sparred another human being. It was the first time I’ve been punched in the mouth along with the first time I’ve punched someone else in the mouth.

I don’t think there’s a better human experience than sparring with another capable man and hating each other for 2 minutes, and then hugging it out afterwards like nothing happened.

After our sparring session was done, I felt like my friendship with these guys grew 10x in the matter of an hour.

It’s absolutely insane what “going to war” with someone can do for your friendship, and it’s definitely one of the biggest learning lessons I took away from last weekend.

Following the weekend, so many conversations spanning business, experiences, and life in general ensued.

People were texting me all throughout the next week about questions they had for me, potential business opportunities, when the next time we’ll get together IRL will be, etc.

So many doors have opened up in my world simply from putting myself in an uncomfortable situation, sticking to my tenants, and trying my best. Sometimes, that’s all it takes to win in life; tenacity and getting uncomfortable.